
185 Seconds
by Carole Bellacera
May
18, 1992, 6:00 P.M.
Chad
Chad
couldn't decide what
to order. There were so many foods he liked.
At first he'd thought about going with fried chicken, but then,
it wouldn't be his mother's, would it? Instead, he'd opted for
a pepperoni pizza, a thin one, New York style, with lots of drippy
cheese and tangy sauce.
He
was thirty-three years old. How many pepperoni pizzas had he put
away in all that time? Hard to believe this one would be his last.
So,
that was what it was going to be. A pepperoni pizza and a giant-sized
Big Gulp from Seven-Eleven. And for dessert? A bag of chocolate-covered
peanuts.
Not
some off-the-wall brand, but Brach's.
After
all, the state was paying for it. A vision of Christ and the Last
Supper flashed through his mind. He looked at the clock on the
gray wall of the holding cell.
Five
hours to live.
Leslie
and Russell
"They're
gonna kill that Chad Donovan tonight," Russell said through
a mouthful of mashed potatoes. "Eleven o'clock. Gonna zap
him in the electric chair."
With
a trembling arthritic hand, Leslie lifted a cup of coffee to her
lips and took a slurping sip. "Now, which ones did he kill?
The people in the fast food restaurant?"
"Naw,
this is the one who burst into that office building and took out
three or four people. Electric chair is too good for him, I say.
They should put him in a room with the families of the victims
and let them have at it."
"Russ,
don't get yourself in a tizzy. You know what it does to your blood
pressure."
The
gray-haired man rolled up the newspaper and tossed it to the floor.
"You're right. He ain't worth it. Pass the salt, Mama."
"Dear,
you know salt isn't good for you."
But
she passed it anyway.
Heather
The
microwave bell dinged just as Heather finished setting the table.
"Steve!
Can you get Brad in his highchair? Dinner's ready!"
She
was like a ballet dancer as she whirled through the kitchen, pouring
the fruit juice, arranging the salad on the table, grabbing the
Lean Cuisine dinners from the microwave.
The
under-the-counter TV was the accompaniment to her Dance of the
Dinner Preparation. "Barring any last-minute stays from the
governor, convicted murderer Chad Donovan will be executed tonight
at eleven o'clock. Donovan has been on death row for the last
seven years....
Steve
entered the dining room with two-year-old Brad on his hip. "I
can't believe you're going to the health club tonight. Three years
ago, you would've been down at the prison with the other protesters."
Heather
grabbed the salad dressing bottles from the refrigerator, closing
the door with her foot. "Three years ago I had a different
life. I don't have time to get involved in causes these days.
Even if I do believe in them. I still think capital punishment
is barbaric, but a bunch of candle-holding hymn-singing activists
isn't going to change anything. So why waste my time?"
She
snapped off the TV. The dance had ended.
Sammy
"Eat
your broccoli, Sammy."
The
four-year-old boy's lower lip trembled. His stomach muscles tightened.
He knew what was coming. But he just couldn't eat that green stuff.
It made him feel sick.
"Did
you hear me, boy? Eat.tm
He looked
up at his father. "I don't like it, Daddy. It tastes funny."
His
mother pushed back from the table. "How about if I heat up
some peas for you? You like, peas, don't you, hon?"
"Sit
down, Rachel. The boy has to learn to eat what's on his plate."
Sammy
felt his father's hard eyes eating into him. For a horrible moment,
he thought he was going to throw up. That would be the worst thing
to do. Daddy would think he'd done it on purpose.
"You
will eat every bite of that broccoli on your plate... if
you know what's good for you, pal."
Sammy
stared down at his plate and willed it to disappear. But he knew
it wouldn't. Nothing ever disappeared. Not even when the
hitting started.
May
18, 9:00
P.M.
Chad
There
was nothing to do now but wait. He'd asked for and received a
television to pass the last few hours until the scheduled time
of his execution. "Murphy Brown" came on and he got
caught up in it. Even laughed a couple of times. But at nine-thirty
he felt a coldness settle inside him. It was a two-parter. He
wouldn't be around to see the second episode next week. A news
brief flashed on the screen. He saw his face looking back at him.
"Details at eleven," the pretty anchorwoman said.
A flicker
of fear ate through him.
The
day before he'd read a newspaper article about his upcoming execution;
185 seconds, it said. That's how long it would take to kill him.
First 1,825 volts of electricity at 7.5 amps for 30 seconds, followed
by 24 volts at 1.5 amps for 60 seconds. A five-second pause would
be followed by a repeat of the 90-second cycle ... just to make
sure he was dead.
Leslie
and Russell
They
were watching a movie on HBO, a violent saga starring Mickey Rourke
as a desperate man holding a family hostage. Russell winced with
every foul word that came out of the actors' mouths. When a nude
scene came on, Leslie stood up.
"Want
some ice cream, hon?"
"Yeah,"
Russell grunted. "Some of that Tin Roof Sundae."
When
Leslie returned with two bowls of ice cream, the nude scene was
over.
Heather
Sweat
beaded and rolled down Heather's lithe body as she jogged along
with the rhythm of a Paula Abdul song. She smiled as her
muscles came alive. This was her reward after a long day at the
office. Twice a week she treated herself to a couple of hours
at the health club. Not only did it keep her body in shape, it
had one added benefit.
It made
her horny.
Steve
loved Monday and Wednesday nights.
Sammy
lay on his stomach in his bunk bed and tried to go to sleep. His
buttocks and thighs stung where the belt had struck him. He smiled
grimly into his pillow. His father had lost the battle. The broccoli
had been tossed down the garbage disposal.
His
stomach growled. Not only had the broccoli been thrown away, so
had the fried chicken. He liked fried chicken, but he hadn't been
permitted to eat any until the broccoli was gone.
The
door to the bedroom opened. It was his mother. She walked
across the room quietly. Sammy knew it was because she
didn't
want his father to know.
"I
brought you a piece of chocolate cake and some milk," she
whispered. "Eat it quickly."
He did.
May
18, 11:00 P.M.
The
movie had gone off at ten o'clock. They'd turned the channel to
the Ten O'Clock News where they watched a clip about Chad Donovan
and his last hours on death row.
Leslie
sighed. "Can you imagine? With all the tasty foods in the
world, he orders pepperoni pizza and chocolate-covered peanuts
for his last meal. Probably never had a lick of home cooking in his life, poor man."
"Good
riddance, I say," Russell snorted. "The world's a better
place without him." The news moved on to Washington where
a group lobbied for a handgun bill. "Look at those stupid
do-gooders," he went on. "Now they want to take away
our right to defend ourselves in our own homes!"
Leslie
squeezed his arm affectionately. "Oh, hon... you know the
N.R.A. won't let them get away with that."
"'You're
right, Mama. Thank the good Lerd we've got somebody watching out
for us ordinary citizens." He put an arm around his wife.
"Let's go to bed, Pretty Lady. Tomorrow's another day."
Heather
Brad
cried out once while Heather and Steve were making love. They
tensed and waited a moment. Silence. They continued in what they
were doing.
Sammy
The
door to his bedroom burst open.
"'What
the hell are you whispering about?"
The
light came on. Sammy cowered in the corner of the bed, staring
up at his father's furious face.
"Oh,
Jesus Christ! You've wet the bed again, haven't you? What am I
going to have to do to break you of this nasty habit?"
Sammy
shrank back as his father approached. There was no escape. His
cruel grip fastened upon the boy's skinny arms. Trembling, Sammy
stared up into his cold eyes. It would begin now. As always, he
prayed for his mother to rescue him, but he knew it wouldn't happen.
The
only thing he could do was disappear into himself, all the time
wishing it was his father who would disappear... forever.
Chad
They'd
shaved his head and right calf. Chad felt as if he'd already been
electrocuted as they strapped him into the chair and covered his
face with a restraining belt with holes cut out for his nose.
Why? For breathing? But they wanted him to stop breathing!
An electrode was placed onto his shaved calf. He was numb. On
the other side of a window, the press was seated in three rows
of benches. They were waiting to witness the execution. The clock
on the wall, the one that would record the moment of his death,
read ten-fifty-eight.
The
metal helmet, lined with a brine-soaked sponge, was placed onto
his head and buckled beneath his chin. It bit into his skin. He
grimaced. For a moment, panic washed over him. He didn't like
pain. And in a matter of seconds, a massive jolt of electricity
would kill him. A sudden memory flashed in his mind. A hot summer
day in 1971. He, a sturdy twelve-year-old, washing the family
car. His favorite song, "Maggie May," had come on the
radio he'd plugged into the outlet just inside the garage. Bare-footed
and standing in a puddle of water, he'd thoughtlessly reached
for the volume diai and received a jolting shock that vibrated
through his fingers and down to his toes for a good two seconds.
For days afterwards his arm had been numb.
That
had been a little shock. Now... in a matter of moments ... he
would experience the big one. He thought back to the day that
had brought him here. It was the receptionist's fault. If she'd
only put him through to her boss. Ross Jackson was an old
friend. He would've found a place for him at the firm. But the
receptionist refused to put him on the phone. How many times had
he called only to be told Ross was out or on another line or in
a meeting. Always after he'd told her his name, of course. It
was obvious she'd been screening Jackson's calls... and his had
been one that wasn't allowed through. It took him a while to realize
Ross had been refusing his calls. But they'd both paid for their
arrogance, hadn't they? The others had just got in the way.
It was
time. Chad waited for the ring of the red phone on the wall. That
was the line where the call would come in--the one that would
stay the execution. It would happen, wouldn't it?
It always did in the movies. The clock's hand was straight up--eleven
o'clock.
The
executioner walked to the control panel, his eyes studiously avoiding
Chad's. Panic overcame Chad. The stay wasn't going to happen.
They were going to kill him. He bucked at the restraints, but
of course he couldn't move. There was no escape, no reprieve.
He squeezed his eyes shut, willing this to be a horrible nightmare,
all of it, the beatings he'd taken from his father, the aimless
wandering from job to job, the failure of every relationship he'd
attempted, the petty thefts, the drunken brawls, the murders,
the years on death row, and now... this. His entire life had been
one long nightmare.
Nothing
was happening. His eyes opened as a tiny peephole of hope entered
his brain. Then he heard the low hum. His body stiffened. He tried
to look out at his audience, to tell them, "Hey, you see
what they're doing to me? Can't you stop it? They're killing me,
They're really doing it."
"This
is it...', screamed his brain in its final moments.
Leslie
and Russell had another day. Heather went to work at the office.
Sammy nursed his wounds of the night before. Twelve years later
the four of them would meet in a shopping mall.
Sammy
would have a gun.
